Some random randomness

Okay so in my random bum life I have come across a couple of things that make my heart smile.

First AfterEllen hipped me to face your manga so now I can finally reveal a complete head shot for you all to see. Here is the real me lol

Then I have a new blog crush Post homo nuyorican homo. Please go and check her out, I may have to stalk *cough* I mean read her blog a whole lot lol! My love affair began when I read her post that was cross posted on racialicious about the new movie bitch slap, and then has only grown through her coverage of America Ferrera's eye roll, which you have to see for yourself.



and I also loved her post trans representation on TV. So my blog crush is official and you should go and crush.. err I mean enjoy her blog too.

and then finally I've given in, I can no longer resist anymore all the pressure anymore I finally did it. I walked into Barnes and Noble and walked around the kids section, but I didn't see it. So I walked upstairs and still couldn't find it so I had to do it I had to ask the information clerk, I had to say "Uhmmm excuse me, Where are the....... Harry Potter books?" It killed me to actually have to verbalize that I intended to buy a Harry Potter book. I tried to make up for it by buying another novel, that wasn't in the kids section so I bought Babyji by Abha Dawesar. I read it in one day, it was really good, I highly suggest you buy it. So now I'm reading the first Harry Potter and it isn't horrible lol. I'm so ashamed lol

oh and random hot athlete pic in honor of the Olympics. I introduce to you Natasha Kai, oh and she's Queer! I love a woman with tattoos!!

My first Pride

I just got back from my very first pride celebration. I had a ball!! It was so much fun!

issues that I had not completely resolved, in going to a Pride parade signaled to me something that I wasn't completely ready to accept before, complete acceptance of who I am. I talk a good talk, but I'm still struggling. So the whole idea of pride just made me really anxious. I felt bad because I didn't feel like I had any pride, and then I felt like there would be a Queer measuring stick that I didn't necessarily measure up to. When talking about this with my best friend she wisely said that maybe pride was about going there with none and coming back with some. II've been having a lot of anxiety about going before. Going to pride made me confront a lot of definitely have to say that that's exactly what happened. I feel so much better about everything; I'm no longer so terrified that people from my undergrad were going to find out the truth. There might be some facebook pictures and I'm okay with that.

Yesterday was the parade and I thought that I had prepped myself but as I began to walk to the spot where I was going to watch the parade, I began to freak out. My heart was racing and I was shaking. I called my best friend in a panic, after she calmed me down and I hung up. Immediately these two guys complimented me on my earrings, and then we started talking and they invited me to walk around with them. They were so nice and I hung out with them for most of the night. Then when I left them, I ran in to a girl who was in one of my classes. It was funny because we both looked at each other and said "What are yoou doing here?!” It was great, because once again I wasn't walking around by myself. The rest of the night got really weird but that’s not what’s important. Today there was just a general festival, and I went by myself hoping to meet people again, but I just ended up hanging out on the grass for a while by myself. I ran in to some girls from a program that I had presented for before. It was nice because I didn't even know that one of them was a lesbian, and there program isn't exactly gay friendly, but they had found each other and banded together. What made me happier is that she remembered me and was happy to see me, while I was presenting she looked real bored, but I made an impact.

I saw so many young kids, holding hands with their boyfriends and girlfriends and not caring, it was beautiful. I saw older people walking around happy and enjoying the day. It was so nice to not have to worry about being seen, people finding out. It was beautiful! I felt so proud and so happy. Then I got to hang out with the girl from my class later, and we did the electric slide on stage, and had a great view of the drag show, and just got to talk about being out on our campus. It was beautiful! I had such a great time and a lot of my anxiety about being out has dissipated, because I know I'm not alone!

Here are some pictures from the Drag Queen show tonight and some stuff I bought

This is part of an airbrush tattoo I got on my arm

I added a pride flag to my flag collection on my wall


A cool incense holder I bought (ignore the stuff in the background lol )

The Queen of Pride

Singing Dear Mr. President

Life is a highway, I'm gonna ride it all night long!

Some pride balloons in the air

I cut of their heads but they just got engaged

Southern Comfort

Today I cried, and I don't cry. I cried because I watched this documentary on logo called Southern Comfort. Southern Comfort is about a man named Robert Eades who died from cancer because he was Transgendered and no one would treat his ovarian cancer. They told him that they weren't taking any new patients; they told him that he would make their other patients uncomfortable. No one would treat him because he was a Trans man. When he first transitioned he wanted to have a hysterectomy, but they said he didn't need it and he died because of it. No one cared whether he lived or died, but he was a wonderful man. I just saw how loving and caring he was and how he cared for so many others. In the documentary he kept talking about his chosen family he showed so much love and the ones who could help him didn't. He said he was turned down by 20 doctors. 20 doctors are responsible for his death, and no one will be held accountable, and even if they were it wouldn't change anything he's still gone, he didn't get to see his grandson grow up like he wanted to, he didn't get to marry his girlfriend. All because he was Trans and I'm just so angry, I can't stand to see this happen, and the worst part is that I know that he's not alone, and he probably won't be the last Trans person to die because no one would treat him. I hate how people like to get in to little arguments and grand discussions about another person's life. They like to discuss whether or not they think that it’s okay with them to be him. And I have to admit I'm guilty of the same thing, I used to think why do you have to have the surgery, but I was wrong it’s not up to me or anyone else.
Recently there was a whole huge discussion about Trans folks on several blogs and some said some really horrible things. I just want to know where the fuck to do you get off? These so called liberals, open minded individuals who would rather see people be hurt rather than be inconvenienced. They want to argue about whether or not they should be allowed to use the same bathrooms because they would be uncomfortable with someone of the opposite gender or even non distinguishable gender be in the same bathroom with them.
I've wanted to write this post for a while especially after I saw Beautiful Daughters about an all trans woman cast of the Vagina Monologues. I love the Vagina Monologues and I love how they always manage to tell the personal stories of the women and their lives. I watched this documentary I saw all of these beautiful women and just admired and appreciated them. We need to go beyond ridiculous conversations and remember that you're not discussing an issue, you are discussing people's lives and there are real consequences for this. Brownfemipower did a great job at calling people out on their shit; I just hope that we can improve as people if this world is ever to have any hope.